I am reminded every once in a while how brave people can be. I’m talking about caregivers. Those who give of themselves, selflessly because they are committed to providing the care and love another person needs when they are sick or injured.
This post has been percolating in my mind all week and just now I’m going to try and assemble my thoughts. It’s hard because of events going on around me. There are two people in my circle who are dealing with the extreme illness of their child. As a parent it is a terrifying thought to lose a child, even the threat is overwhelming.
But what if you are faced with a long term illness without knowing what the ultimate conclusion will be? Will they get to their graduation and if so, to their wedding? Will they have children and live a normal life (if there is such a thing).
How do you cope with your own fears and those of your other children and family members? As parents and often mothers we are faced with being the leader, all roads lead from us. I remember when my sister was so sick that at several points I wanted to run away and pretend it wasn’t happening. I remember trying to broker deals with God. One time I said to him “cut off my arm”. I can live without my arm or a leg, just save my sister. Since I still have both my arms and legs and not my sister; that plan didn’t work. At one point I thought things couldn’t get any worse and then they did.
We try and find a possible reason for what’s happening. Why her? It’s not fair. But in reality why not her and life is often not fair; we all know that but still expect it somehow especially for young people who haven’t had a chance to live their lives.
Sometimes people get angry with God. How could a merciful God strike down a child or a loved one but God never said our time here on earth would be easy, only once you died and went to heaven to join him. It’s as if we have to put these incredibly powerful feelings somewhere.
I would like to acknowledge all the caregivers that put their own lives virtually on hold to care for others. When people like me go home to play tennis or read a new book, others go to the hospitals or home to care for sick loved ones or parents with dementia. A friend of mine stopped working as a nurse to care for her mother. These are the sacrifices born of compassion and commitment.
This is love
This post is dedicated to Anna and Sylvie and their daughters. May these dark days become just a distant memory.
If you enjoyed this post, please consider leaving a comment or subscribing to the feed to have future articles delivered to your feed reader.
Related posts:
- Who Told You Life Would Be Fair?
- Worry Wart - Learn to Stop Worrying
- Negative Events Generate Space for Positive Growth
- Ben Dagenais – A Truly Superior Human Being and Friend
- The Nut Doesn’t Fall Far From The Tree
Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.
{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }
caregivers indeed deserve some recognition and appreciation. their job is one of the noblest jobs in the world. just imagine the world w/o them..
It takes a special person to take care of strangers. And I took care of my mom, as my website shares, and it was very difficult. But because of her alert ways, it was the right thing to do. She passed away Nov 27, 2010. I miss her.
I second the motion. These people you describe are, in my mind, the reason Hell hasn’t opened up and eaten us already. Just getting into a profession like nursing or care-giving is admirable in itself, but to go there everyday, to do it voluntarily is nothing short of saintly. I used to know a guy who accompanied people in their last moments when they had no family/friends, and were suffering from a terminal illness. No words need to be added , I think.
Sam, welcome to my blog. I hope you come back often and don’t hesitate to bring friends. You are so right, this blog is able family members caring for other family members but imagine if no one volunteered to do anything. There would be no soup kitchen, animal shelters, support groups, Scouts or Girl Guides. Our society would be in an even bigger mess. They deserve a huge thank you.
Gary Anderson, thanks for commenting. I checked out your blog.
You were brave to take on your Mother. Just because we love someone and have a feeling of responsibility doesn’t make them easier to live with. Most people would have placed her. What I hope you have now is a feeling of peace and that you did your best and that is all anyone can expect. Because you did this I’m sure you don’t feel the guilt some people feel when loved ones die. You will miss her and you always will. It does get easier as time goes by and the mind is kind, it will filter out the difficult times and leave you with the good memories.
Bless you for hanging in there.
Jason, I’m confident you would do all possible to support your friends and family, even if your memory appears to be going….love you.