Today I said good bye to my friend Ben Dagenais. Last Tuesday he literally dropped dead at work. No efforts to revive him helped and he died Tuesday afternoon when he suffered a fatal heart attack while walking up the stairs after lunch.
This was shocking to all of us who loved him. He has a lovely wife Chantal and two sons Nicolas and Frederick. Ben and I met four years ago when I joined the Commercial team. He and I worked on major accounts for Heavy Maintenance. We worked tirelessly together to get aircraft delivered on time and to invoice them correctly. No easy task!
Often we would have to go see customers to “take a beating” and afterward we would laugh our faces off in the parking lot because at the end of the day, we did our best which is pretty damn good and hey it’s not the end of the world.
So this 41 year old man who didn’t smoke, rarely drank and was an athlete drops dead at work. How can that be, we were all in shock. One minute you’re alive and then you’re dead. No fair. We all know life isn’t fair but seriously (his expression) this is really not fair.
Chantal and Ben were deeply in love and had a wonderful life. Ben had a multi-generational home built so Chantal’s parents could live beside them. This is now such a blessing as she will not be alone to take care of them. I’m sure he did not think this would be the outcome.
Today was Ben’s funeral. It was standing room only. Even our President attended which I thought was really nice. People came from all over the country, even past employees all there to pay homage to a truly superior human being.
I was fine because I was slightly medicated by gravol until the priest said that it was time for us to separate from Ben. I saw the pallbearers in the back of the church. That’s when it hit me, this is real, he’s not coming back. Then I started to cry which I was unable to do all week because it was so surreal that someone so full of life could be felled in a moment.
It was a lovely service in a small intimate church on the water front. How beautiful it must be in the summer. After the service I approached his wife, Chantal to express my condolences. What she said to me will stay with me for the rest of my life. She said, that Ben loved me so much. This was incredibly comforting because I loved Ben.
So my dear friend, I promise never to forget you because you are unforgettable. I truly believe we will meet again. You are so full of love and love never dies. Thank you for all the support and caring ever since I met you. I miss you so much.
Your Friend Kay
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{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }
I’m so sorry.. it hurts so much to lose such a dear friend.
Hugggss
We hear the phrase “We are not promised tomorrow” all the time, but never really seem to think about what it means until we lose someone. I am so very, very sorry to hear about your friend. I don’t know if this will help or not - but it helps me in times of strife, so I’ll share: When you cannot see God’s hand at work, you must trust His heart.
So sad to hear about Ben…
Myself and my friends at S7 express sincere condolences…
Let’s enjoy each of the moment we are with our friends.
There is no way Ben will be forgotten, he will always be fondly and dearly remember - a truly superior human being and friend.
Quoting something from ‘The Last Lecture‘ by Randy Pausch, “Time is all you have. And you may find one day that you have less than you think.” We are always thinking that there is always time to let our loved ones know how much we love them, but the truth is, we will never know if there is a tomorrow.
Thank you for this beautiful tribute to your friend and this wonderful reminder to us to show our loved ones how much they are loved for we will never know if there is a tomorrow.
Thank you to all who have commented on my tribute to Ben. You are very wise and generous. I really appreciate your points of view and feedback.
Igor, thanks to you and S7 for your expressions of sympathy. The best part of our working together is building our friendship. All the best.
Ben will always be in our heart. Thanks for this “clin d’oeil”. xoxx