I‘ve been sick for 12 days now, started coughing up a lung Sunday before last; this after being sick over Christmas holidays. I am not impressed. After not missing a single day of work last year, I’m stuck at home with a fever and cough so severe I couldn’t sleep, eight days of increasing fever, headache, earache and body aches. What I’ve realized is I’m a crappy sick person. Even though I’ve worked every day from home until yesterday, I still feel terrible missing work. What is wrong with me? I mean really. Am I lacking sufficient self confidence be able to accept that I’m not Superwoman and I deserve to take care of myself when I do fall ill. The jury is in and the verdict is yes.
I think being at home sick makes me feel like a loser. I’m sorry I’m just being honest about feelings. I am much nicer to other people when they’re sick than I am to myself. I definitely think this is something I need to work on.
It’s not that I don’t think my team can take care of business, quite the opposite. I have no illusions that I am irreplaceable, it’s really not that. I do have a ridiculous work ethic which for the most part has served me well.
Tuesday night we went back to the clinic for X-rays and the doctor sent us to the hospital for an investigation with a lung specialist. We spent the day in the hospital and the final answer is pneumonia. At least we have a diagnosis and a treatment plan but not before I hit a fever of 104.3 and didn’t even have enough breath to speak. When you can’t breathe life becomes very very simple. Take a breath, try to do it again. All of your attention is focused to keep breathing. I have a whole new appreciation for what my son has suffered all his life with his asthma.
So I am starting my way back, I turned off my computer, and will take care of myself so I can get back to my life as soon as possible.
Everyone has been so wonderful and helpful to me, my family, my friends and co-workers. I am very fortunate to have so many concerned people around me. And yes, I have to get over myself.
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{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }
Sorry to hear you are sick. That would be very scary not to be able to breathe! Hope you get better soon, take care of yourself.
Get well soon, Kay. We send you all our love (Myles included).
Sorry to hear that you have been sick. Hope that you feel well and get well real soon.
It took me a long time to figure out that it was impossible to be Wonder Woman (that golden lasso will strangle you every time). I’m not a very good sick person either, but I have learned (the hard way of course :o) to keep my focus on the blessings. I hope that you are now well on the mend, and feel much better soon!
Hope all this passes and you will soon be back to normal. But it won’t happen unless you take care of yourself. So take care, please.
i do pray you’ll get well soon kay. Godspeed!
Thanks everyone for your kind wishes to help me get better. I am improving everyday, will admit feeling some “cabin fever”. I went to the doctor today to see if I could go back to work tomorrow. He laughed and said you don’t recover from pneumonia in a week. Hopefully I’ll be released from this prison next week. Thanks again.