To get to a certain age as I have, I’ve had many many teachers. It is time to acknowledge their contribution to who I am. We are guided by many hands and hearts along the way. We can learn by both positive and negative experiences. What to do and what not to do.
From my Mum I learned to be caring Mother. I learned I was loved and wanted, these are important building blocks which you only understand the value of later in life. I also learned that anyone can become an alcoholic, it doesn’t matter how smart and nice you are and as much as she loved us, she couldn’t stop, at least she didn’t stop.
From my Dad who was a very tough business man I learned that if I was prepared to work hard enough, I could achieve pretty much anything I put my mind to. He instilled confidence in my ability. This has served me well over the years. Since he died, I’ve realized he did love me unconditionally, I just didn’t know it. I also learned to be there emotionally for your family which he was not capable of but I’ve also learned he was a product of his time and this was not valued or expected from a British man.
From my Sister I learned incredible courage and tenacity through adversity and pain. Whenever I have to endure something difficult I think of what she went through and I tell myself I can do it. She was my big Sister and my protector and I miss that terribly.
From my children I’ve learned how much I would do to help them, what it is to feel unconditional love, what pride and fear feels like sometimes at the same time. The emotions of parenthood run the gamut.
From my Grandchildren I’ve learned how incredibly special they are to me and how intensely close I feel to them, the depth of the connection between generations.
From my real friends I’ve learned I don’t have to be superwoman all the time, sometimes I can just be me and that’s good enough. I can let them take care of me once and a while, it won’t kill me.
From my husband I’ve learned what it’s like to be loved for who I really am inside, for myself and to have a soft place to fall.
There are many other people in my professional life past and present that influence me daily and have taught me important lessons on how to treat others and work effectively together. Some have taught quite the opposite but it is all important in the grand scheme of things.
From myself I’ve learned it is a continuing journey of self discovery and change as I make my way towards my authentic self. I’ve also learned there is no end to the learning. This blog helps me challenge my thinking and perspective, put it all together, sometimes take a step back. As you can see I have been incredibly fortunate to have been blessed with wonderful people to guide me however; I have been ready to take the lessons offered.
Who has influenced you the most in your life? I would love to hear.
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What a beautiful blog, Kay. After reading it, I spent some time reflecting on the people who have influenced and inspired me. I would like to share this with you.
I believe that my mother tried her best to teach me how to keep a clean house, cook, and to always be a lady. Unfortunatly, none of these things stuck ( I promise to keep trying!) But what I did learn is that it is important to embrace your children for WHO they are. My mother had six of us and we are all weirdos, but she has never made us feel that way. With her we always feel accepted.
My father instilled in me the importance of family. He was a man who would do anything for his family. He taught me to appreciate my family and to work hard at keeping us close. One of the last things he said to us was that it was important for us to stick together and keep eachother strong.
Kay, you have definetly influenced me positively in my life. You have taught me to take a breath and assess situations instead of jumping headfirst into panic mode (as I am programmed to do) You have encouraged me to have more confidence in myself. Through you I have also learned that occaisionally falling apart doesn’t mean that I am not a strong person. That is just to name a few.
The one person that I believe has influenced and inspired me the most ( and I think you will like this!) is Danny. He knows what he wants in life. He is passionate about it and he really believes in himself and I find that inspiring. From him I have learned that you have to believe in yourself.
I feel that Danny confronted me about things that I was too afraid to see for myself. And then he stood by me while I figured those things out. He continued to love me through the times that I didn’t really love myself. That taught me something about love that I’d never known before.
Danny has also shown me how to focus on the positive in situations. I am a natural-born pessimist and can get pretty gloomy at times (as you know) but I have learned to try and find the silver lining. Most of the time, just changing my own attitude has turned what could have been a crappy day into a great one!
When I sit at home with Danny and Rowan and Raina, and I watch my little family, the way they play together and laugh, how openly they show affection, it reminds me how important it is that we keep growing and learning and most importantly, loving.
My mom definitely influenced my life the most!