I thought long and hard on whether to write this blog. I came to the conclusion that if Katie Couric can have her colonoscopy filmed for prime time television, that’s good enough for me. She had her test filmed to bring attention to this life saving test that no one, especially me wanted to take. Her husband died of colon cancer at an early age leaving her and their two young daughters. I’m hoping that by sharing my colonoscopy experience, some of you might decide to get one and potentially save your life.
I did pretty much everything to avoid taking it. I did the preliminary blood smear test and fortunately that was negative. I researched having the virtual colonoscopy with the camera which is fine but the preparation is the same and if you have polyps you have to go back and have a regular colonoscopy anyway which means a second day of preparation.
I had and have a fear of this test. Since I had a bad experience as a teenager in a local hospital, I have avoided any examination in this area. I actually have a phobia about it. There must be a name for that. I remember when I was pregnant and they told me that during labor sometimes they check you rectally to see how many centimeters you are dilated, I said “find another way because that won’t be happening” and I made sure it didn’t.
So now I’m over 50, my Dad had a tumor in his colon and being the reasonably rational person I can be, I’m thinking that I really have to step up and get this done. I speak to my GP and she writes the referral to my favorite Gastroenterologist. The appointment was for April and he agrees that I really need to get tested. The appointment is set for Nov. 4 which is six months away so although when I would think about it my stomach would immediately knot up; it’s still a long ways away.
Have you noticed these things that are far away but not pleasant seem to come up faster than the things we want. Just an observation…. It was off to Glasgow for the Badminton tournament which we lost in the finals by the way. I knew when I got back there was only a week left until the DAY!
The week before my doctor’s nurse called to review the instructions for the preparation and I told her what a chicken I am and she assured me they would give me enough sedative to help me through. Even talking to her about it, I was in a cold sweat. I had arranged to work from home the day before and that is absolutely required. You need to be home and very close to the bathroom for the entire day.
The day before, you start at 10:00 with the first preparation. I remember working and looking at the clock, 8:00 - two more hours, 9:00 - one more hour. It was like I was walking the plank. 10:00 - took the stuff - not as bad as I anticipated, we won’t go into the details of the rest of the day.
I was so exhausted by the end of the day, I actually did sleep some. My appointment was for 9:30 and I went in about 10:00. My husband Marc came with me even to change into my hospital gown. I reiterated my fear to the nurse who was very nice and she said she would take care of things. As I closed the curtain to get changed, I got big tears in my eyes. This is it, unless I get stupid here, I’m actually going through with this. The doctor had said that if I freaked out, I could wait until the end of the day and they would see if they could put me to sleep for the test.
To tell you the truth, other than the fear of the test, the next thing was I was so damn hungry. Going 38 hours without eating is a first for me. I’d decided whatever I felt like eating afterward I would have as a reward. I spent a lot of time fantasizing but couldn’t decide on anything in particular, everything sounded good to me.
So I get called and walk the plank into the room, they set up the IV and give me my drugs. I feel a little tingling in my hands but that’s about it. He starts the test and then it gets quite uncomfortable and I complain loudly more than once. They talk me through it, encouraging me and telling me it’s almost over. And then it is over. I honestly don’t know how long it took but it wasn’t long, just felt like an eternity and the drugs did not work on me which I anticipated because my family is very resistant to valium and Demerol.
You guys are going to like this. I forgot to tell you I couldn’t wear any jewelry and had to take off my nail polish. For those who know me, that is heresy. Kay without nail polish and jewelry; this is unheard of. At least they didn’t make me take off my make-up! Even when my boys were in diapers, I had my nail polish and no chips either thank you very much. The nurse told me I could leave my socks and shoes on but I looked so silly I took my socks off and put them in the locker. I’m sitting there freezing my feet off because I don’t want to look silly in my hospital gown. How’s that for vanity! Marc went and got my socks and I put them on.
Another funny thing is I’ve been there before for both my son Marc and my husband Marc for gastroscopy (down the throat) and that waiting room is so stressful. All of these people haven’t eaten, are worried about the test and/or the results. So you look at all the people in the hospital gowns and you can immediately tell who is getting what test. The ones that have no pants showing below their gowns are getting the colonoscopies, ha ha ha. Thank goodness my sense of humor rarely leaves me. In fact when I’m nervous I make jokes, some of them are even funny.
The test was over, everything is good inside and after a short time I got to leave because the drugs didn’t work and I was stone cold sober. My husband took me to a local restaurant and I had a nice big breakfast, came home and got back to work. The feeling of relief was quite overwhelming and that feeling of euphoria lasted at least a day. I kept saying that great thing about Thursday was that it wasn’t Wednesday.
So I wasn’t terribly brave, I whined and complained but I did it. That’s the important part. If you need this test and if you’re over 50 and/or you have family members with a history of colon cancer, please get it done to save yourself and your family heartache and pain.
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{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }
Funny how you were so concerned about your “look.” No jewelry or nail polish is not an issue for me since I never wear either, except for a watch. I have to know what time it is. Glad it all turned out okay for you.
Yes I admit to being vain. My Dad liked to say that when I was born they said I had a big nose but beautiful hands. I have always ensured they stay that way. Thanks for the good wishes,
Dear Kay,my good friend. I so thoroughly enjoy your writings The kayway. I just finished reading your latest on getting a Colonoscopy done and I must say you bring a great sense of Humour to the Story along with a most Important message that can potentially save someones Life. Reading the story brought back memories of when I went through three months of Radiation treatment for my Prostate Cancer. Like yourself, I am a big wimp when it comes to hospitals. Even as I drive by them I never look at them. However, the people I met, those that I comforted and they comforted me became changing experiences in my Life. But above all the worry and anxiety a human can comprehend,if you can keep your sense of Humour about you, then their is nothing in the world that can intimidate you,nothing..One very funny story I can remember was day one when I walked down a hallway in a Johnny coat to be greeted by 5 or 6 radiologists(all women) who greeted me and then asked me to take my underwear off..Any man’s Dream right,but you can well imagine my nightmare at the time…Well,I managed to get through that day unscathed and a lot more humble than I had ever experienced . Then there was another time, when I dropped my bottle of water on the floor and forgetting that I had my johnny coat on without any underwear bent over and exposed my rump to two older ladies that were voluteering for a group called HOPE AND COPE,Well they say a picture is worth a thousand words,unfortunately I didn’t have a camera and consequently I don’t Think they ever recovered..ha ha , Well Kay, all I want to say is Thanks for the kayway. Keep up the writing , you truly have a Fabulous and creative Knack..
Your Friend
Brian Robinson
Brian, thank for sharing your story. Had you not commented on this blog, I would have been disappointed. You and I see the world from a view similar place. Indeed my sense of humor has saved me even at the most difficult times of my life, much more difficult then having a test. I have been very fortunate in this life to have so many wonderful people to love and at the same time have had some really difficult experiences. I think my message here was yes I didn’t want to have it, yes I was fearful of it and yes I was stripped of my girly amenities and yes did it even though I would not get a medal for my bravery.
Just do it!
You are and will continue to be one of the best people on the planet.